Welcome to my Vault of Memories

Whenever I regale someone (roommate, friend, captive coworker, stranger on the subway, etc.) with the particularly dramatic, sad, hilarious, self-deprecating, and/or unbelievable thing that happened to me sometime (last night, last weekend, in college, when I was in fourth grade, when I was in the womb, etc.), that someone often tells me, "You should write that down." Perhaps they are saying this because it will spare them from having to listen to another one of my stories. But I've decided to listen to those someones and actually write it all down: for posterity, for my ego, for comic relief, for the days when I can't seem to make sense of anything. I hope you can laugh with or at me; comment when something strikes you as interesting or wrongheaded; and share your own stories from your personal vault of memories.